🔥 ENROLLMENT CLOSING IN 10:00(resets like magic)

Become a Course Seller in 7 Minutes (No Skills Required)

⚠️ Only 7 seats left (updates in real time)

12,483%

Mindset Gain

0

Real Skills

∞

Funnel Stages

Masterclass

Course Seller™

⭐ 4.9 (totally real)

✅Module 1: Say “value” 43 times

✅Module 2: Rent a Lamborghini screenshot

✅Module 3: Convert friends into leads

✅Module 4: Discord = community

✅Module 5: Advanced: “trust the process”

Satire disclaimer

This site is parody. Don’t take anything here as financial advice. If you’re here for “guaranteed profits,” you are exactly the joke.

As seen on

Forbes-ish

Bloomberg-ish

WSJ-ish

TechCrunch-ish

Mom

The Funnel™ (Interactive)

Click through the legendary 3-step system used by 97% of “mentors”.

“Limited slots” engine

Step 1

Free Webinar

37 minutes of “my story” + 3 minutes of actual info.

Step 2

PDF Bundle

19 pages of screenshots and motivation. Knowledge not included.

Step 3

Elite Mastermind 🔒

Buy more $COURSE to unlock.

Funnel Status: Not yet indoctrinated

Disclaimer: clicking buttons does not grant skills. It grants vibes.

Guru Revenue Calculator

Adjust your confidence and buzzwords. Reality automatically disconnects.

Confidence Level

73% (earned? no)

Buzzwords per Minute

21 bpm (brainwashing pace)

Projected Monthly Income

$10,714

Based on: vibes, funnels, and “I made $10k in 3 days” energy.

✅ Includes: screenshots, urgency timers, fake testimonials

❌ Excludes: skills, ethics, refund policy

Contract Address

Paste this into Jupiter / your wallet. (We’ll update after launch.)

COMING_SOON

Solscan

Explorer link (add after launch)

Dexscreener

Chart link (add after launch)

Swap

Jupiter/Raydium link (add after launch)

Live Chart

Dexscreener widget embeds here.

“Results not typical”

1

Get SOL

Top up a wallet (Phantom, Backpack). You need SOL for swaps + fees.

2

Swap on Jupiter

Paste the contract address, choose SOL → $COURSE, confirm swap.

3

Become a Guru

Post a thread: “Here’s how I did it.” (Satire. Please touch grass.)

Testimonials

100% real, verified, definitely not made up.

“I went from broke to broke, but now I’m confident.”

— Ty L.

“Life-changing… for the seller.”

— Anonymous (Paid Tier)

“This course taught me the value of selling courses.”

— Coach #481

FAQ (Frequently Asked Quacks)

Tap a question to unlock premium knowledge.

No. It’s a satire site for a meme coin. The ‘course’ language is the joke.

Not financial advice. Parody project. Don’t be weird.